{"id":12867,"date":"2010-09-26T17:31:28","date_gmt":"2010-09-26T23:31:28","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/oooorgle.com\/BeyondTheCorral\/?p=12867"},"modified":"2014-11-27T10:17:27","modified_gmt":"2014-11-27T17:17:27","slug":"dance-monkeys-dance","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/oooorgle.com\/BeyondTheCorral\/dance-monkeys-dance\/","title":{"rendered":"Dance, Monkeys, Dance"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"ErnestCline.com<\/a> | Dance, Monkeys, Dance – A Spoken Word by Ernest Cline<\/p>\n


<\/p>\n

[audio:http:\/\/www.ernestcline.com\/spokenword\/Dance_Monkeys_Dance-Ernie_Cline-v2.mp3]
\nDownload .mp3<\/a><\/p>\n


<\/p>\n


\nhttp:\/\/pauloang.com\/dmd\/dance_monkeys.html<\/a><\/p>\n


<\/p>\n

Orbiting the sun at about 93 million miles
\nis a little blue planet
\nand this planet is run
\nby a bunch of monkeys.<\/p>\n

Now, the monkeys don’t think of
\nthemselves as monkeys.
\nThey don’t even think of themselves as animals
\nAnd they love to list all the things
\nthat they think
\nseparate them from the animals:
\nOpposable thumbs, self awareness . . .
\nThey’ll use words like
\nHomo Erectus and Australopithecus.<\/p>\n

You say Toe-mate-o,
\nI say Toe-motto.
\nThey’re animals all right.
\nThey’re monkeys.
\nMonkeys with high-speed digital fiber optic technology,
\nbut monkeys nevertheless.<\/p>\n

I mean, they’re clever.
\nYou’ve got to give them that.
\nThe Pyramids, skyscrapers, phantom jets,
\nthe Great Wall of China.
\nThat’s all some pretty impressive shit . . .
\nfor a bunch of monkeys.<\/p>\n

Monkeys whose brains have evolved
\nto such an unmanageable size
\nthat it’s now pretty much impossible
\nfor them stay happy for any length of time<\/p>\n

In fact, they’re the only animals
\nthat think they’re supposed to be happy.
\nAll of the other animals can just be.<\/p>\n

But it’s not that simple for the monkeys.<\/p>\n

You see, the monkeys are cursed with consciousness
\nand so the monkeys are afraid.
\nSo the monkeys worry.
\nThe monkeys worry about everything,
\nbut mostly about what all the other monkeys think.
\nBecause the monkeys desperately want to fit in
\nwith the other monkeys.<\/p>\n

Which is hard to do,
\nbecause a lot of the monkeys seem to hate each other.
\nThis what really separates them from the other animals.
\nThese monkeys hate.
\nThey hate monkeys that are different.
\nMonkeys from different places,
\nmonkeys who are a different color-<\/p>\n

You see, the monkeys feel alone.
\nAll six billion of them.<\/p>\n

Some of the monkeys pay another monkey
\nto listen to their problems.<\/p>\n

Because the monkeys want answers
\nand the monkeys don’t want to die.
\nSo the monkeys make up gods
\nand then they worship them.
\nThen the monkeys argue
\nover whose made-up god is better.
\nThen the monkeys get really pissed off
\nand this is usually when the monkeys decide
\nthat it’s a good time to start killing each other.<\/p>\n

So the monkeys wage war.
\nThe monkeys make hydrogen bombs.
\nThe monkeys have got their whole fucking planet
\nwired up to explode.
\nThe monkeys just can’t help it.<\/p>\n

Some of the monkeys play to a sold out crowd . . .
\nof other monkeys.<\/p>\n

The monkeys make trophies
\nand then they give them to each other.
\nLike it means something.<\/p>\n

Some of the monkeys think
\nthat they have it all worked out.
\nSome of the monkeys read Nietzsche
\nThe monkeys argue about Nietzsche
\nwithout given any consideration to the fact
\nthat Nietzsche
\nwas just another fucking monkey.<\/p>\n

The monkeys make plans.
\nThe monkeys fall in love.
\nThe monkeys fuck
\nand then they make more monkeys.<\/p>\n

The monkeys make music
\nand then the monkeys DANCE
\nDance, monkeys, dance.<\/p>\n

The monkeys make a hell of a lot of noise.
\nExhibit A
\nMonkey making noise.
\nAnd when he’s done,
\nfive other randomly selected monkeys
\nwill rate this monkey’s noises
\non a scale from one to ten.
\nAt the end of the night,
\nthey add all the numbers up
\nto see which monkey made the best noises.<\/p>\n

As you can see . . .
\nthese are some fucked up monkeys.<\/p>\n

These monkeys are at once the ugliest
\nand most beautiful creatures on the planet.<\/p>\n

And the monkeys don’t want to be monkeys.
\nThey want to be something else.
\nBut they’re not.<\/p>\n

More Spoken Word by Ernie Cline here<\/a>.<\/p>\n


<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

ErnestCline.com | Dance, Monkeys, Dance – A Spoken Word by Ernest Cline [audio:http:\/\/www.ernestcline.com\/spokenword\/Dance_Monkeys_Dance-Ernie_Cline-v2.mp3] Download .mp3 http:\/\/pauloang.com\/dmd\/dance_monkeys.html Orbiting the sun at about 93 million miles is a little blue planet and this planet is run by a bunch of monkeys. Now, the monkeys don’t think of themselves as monkeys. They don’t even think of themselves as […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[861,295],"tags":[690,410],"class_list":["post-12867","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-audio","category-video","tag-authority","tag-obedience"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/oooorgle.com\/BeyondTheCorral\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12867","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/oooorgle.com\/BeyondTheCorral\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/oooorgle.com\/BeyondTheCorral\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/oooorgle.com\/BeyondTheCorral\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/oooorgle.com\/BeyondTheCorral\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=12867"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/oooorgle.com\/BeyondTheCorral\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12867\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/oooorgle.com\/BeyondTheCorral\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=12867"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/oooorgle.com\/BeyondTheCorral\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=12867"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/oooorgle.com\/BeyondTheCorral\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=12867"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}